My truely self

Hello and Assalamualaikum to everyone!

My friends always said that am always smiling and happy, but my best friends are always said to me "Asyfa, do not be sad, be patient okay?". Can you see the difference there? Well if you understand, good. In front of my friends, I often see and categorized as charismatic, high humor, ambitious, stylish, a lot of talk, very friendly, good listener, always happy, always smiling and laughing, know many people, the city girl, love to give advice, clever and kind of things

While the presence of the person who does not know me, I will be labeled as arrogant, city girl, stylish, rich, showing off, and many many more. But the truth? Only me and a few people know about myself, who am I. Moreover, now I already went to the University, so to find a friend who understands me is really and really hard. But I'm glad, because I have found a few friends who understand me.

I'm not a girl which is the days are filled with joy, but often filled with sorrow. And although I often carve my lip smile, but it does not means my heart smiling also. My heart is always crying and pierced. I just hide it well from all of people, because I don't want anyone to know. I don't want people sympathetic to me. Furthermore, if my friends sad and crying in front of me, I will put aside my grief and bring happiness to them. I don't like to see my friends sad. I'll cheer them up.

I'm actually a quiet person, I more prefer to let my friends talk, and I'll listen to their story. I also don't like to tell my daily story to anyone, I would rather to keep it in my heart and my mind because not all the story of mine are a happy story. I do not want to change any happy person to sad mood after hearing the story of me. I am also not a good or nice person actually, so please stop calling me "nice". I'm also a weak human beings, and had made many sins. I've got a bad record of discipline in highschools in the presence of late for school almost every day and dropping classes of cases (fly). So don't call me good, I'm not as good as you think.

I'm a person who will always give an advice to others but not to myself. I've never use the advice that I've give to friends for myself. Internal and external myself  very different. I just express what the pent up in my heart. Please accept my personal one as they are if you want to be friends with me.

I'm sorry if I have been mistaken or wrong. Assalammualaikum ♥